every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
FUCK WHALES
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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