Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
