Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Still dying that you shit outside
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
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