This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
