You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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