Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
