I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
