I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
