Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
