Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
