Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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