At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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