Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
