how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
