What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
