whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Randomize
