i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
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