For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
