I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
