Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
