so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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