he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
you had me at cake vodka
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
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