I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize