My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
