we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
