Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
