: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
