So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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