her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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