I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize