sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize