Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
