I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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