In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
i need some magic done to my vagina
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
