remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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