I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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