Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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