You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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