You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
