Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
