The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
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