if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize