Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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