sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
You can't special order awesome
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
