There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
