you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
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