What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Drunk walkin through police station. America
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
