I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize