Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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