he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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