where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
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